What is Resilience?

Life moves in waves—some gentle, some crashing. Amidst the highs and lows, resilience is the quiet force that helps us keep going. But what exactly is resilience?

Back Beach, New Zealand

Resilience is often misunderstood as being “tough” or emotionally unshakeable. In truth, it’s more like a flexible tree that bends in the wind rather than breaking. It’s the capacity to adapt, recover, and grow stronger after facing challenge, change, or adversity.

The Nature of Resilience

At its core, resilience is the ability to return to center. Whether life throws us loss, stress, disappointment, or uncertainty, resilience allows us to stay connected to our inner strength. It's not about avoiding discomfort but learning to meet it with awareness, kindness, and courage.

Resilience is:

• Emotional regulation – the ability to feel deeply but not be overwhelmed.

• Mental flexibility – seeing possibilities and adapting to change.

• Inner resourcefulness – drawing from our own wells of wisdom, values, and purpose.

• Connection – being able to reach out, ask for help, or lean into community.

Cultivating Resilience

Resilience isn’t something we’re either born with or not—it can be nurtured. Practices like mindfulness, breathwork, yoga, creative expression, rest, and self-reflection all help build our capacity to bounce back.

In somatic approaches, we often talk about how the body holds our stories. Resilience lives not just in the mind but in our nervous system, in the way we breathe, move, and respond. Each time we pause, yield, and listen inward, we strengthen the inner scaffolding that helps us navigate life with more steadiness.

The Gentle Path to Strength

It’s important to remember: resilience is not about “pushing through.” It’s about responding with presence. Sometimes, resilience looks like resting. Sometimes, it’s setting a boundary. Sometimes, it’s simply being honest with how you feel.

In my own life and in the work I share through yoga and somatics, I see resilience as a relationship—with ourselves, with our bodies, with the natural rhythms of life. Like a muscle, it grows with care, consistency, and compassion.

So next time you face a difficult moment, ask gently:

What do I need to come back to myself right now?

That question alone is a seed of resilience.